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The social connections of a single 20-something woman: moved away from parents, college roommates, not yet in with a man, children a decade or so away … In this modern world we live in, what fulfills the young woman of today – can a quarter-lifer “have it all”—Or just a quarter of life?

We find ourselves living in a world in which Tom Cruise has gone insane, read: the dream man has proven all too real; a dud, or worse; a dick. So who or what can complete me?

Our generation is in a tough spot. We were raised in a world where we still learned to someday be good wives, housekeepers and mothers. At 6, we dreamt of weddings, shared beds, and played with baby dolls and giving labor.

We went through high school becoming lonelier and lonelier, discovering this disturbing thing we now know as “horniness”, and finally went off to college. There we learned that men disappoint even when we get them to love us – or “love” us, because it probably isn’t real still at that point. It’s a surreal life of halves: sheltered freedom, non-private loneliness, structured responsibilities, and hard work with no pay. A La-La Land of open space, where if you party an ounce too much, you might destroy your entire future. A crazy world of protected harshness, promises if you make it that far, but still just all too fair than actual society, filled with second and third chances.

And now we’re out into the world. Single, renters, just starting to learn that part of life that comes after education … alone. Men have their own best friends, and women, well we can’t afford – or haven’t yet been gifted – our own diamond.

Now in the 21^st century, 36 year olds are still single and loving it. And we 26 year olds love it, too, but we still have those scared little girls inside of us secretly fearing we will shrivel up at 30 if we are still unmarried (or at least not yet engaged).

So really now, what can complete us? Girl friends, even guy friends, for sure. Even married individuals need those, but the good companionships are just as rare to find as that husband.

We invest in pocket books like closets are our empty voids. But no, it’s not material things…

Pop culture reruns, celebrity, and personal experiences are recently shouting out to me one possible answer; the importance of dogs to create or complete “family”. I personally have felt how man’s best friend can feel like woman’s baby or even a little sis. But can canine companions step in to the hearts of women as a surrogate woman’s best man?

In an old, old (yet recently aired via syndication) episode of Sex and the City, Charlotte York adopted a puppy because she hadn’t yet found a husband. This scheme ended badly, with the dog misbehaving just like most men women date. (To the pup’s defense, at least he didn’t cheat; however chewing on purses was a very bad sign.) I think the whole problem was that she in fact mistreated the dog. Dogs, and any non-human beings, cannot replace lovers. They should truly be treated as the needy, immature, yet unconditional-loving babies that they act as, our children.

And when Ellen DeGeneres found the true kindred family for adopted Iggy, it should be recognized that that pup found its better home. Mutts & Moms, the dog adoption organization, should recognize true puppy love. One issue about to get outraged is their policy on ‘no children under age 14’. Sure, Chihuahuas may be too fragile and nippy for young children, but this policy is unnecessary and any such policy should be taken on a personality-by-personality basis. One can learn a thing or two in the death-threat reactions of the public. First; “you catch more flies with honey …”. Hopefully, the people in charge of this organization can come to recognize the appropriate family this hair stylist and her children are, and things will work out.

Secondly, the reaction just goes to show you how devoted people today are to the best domesticated animal in the world. It’s wonderful that our society can get so passionate about this beloved type of family member, but there are adoption rules for reasons, and there are times to break certain rules. Animals must be treated well.

So should the fabulous single, in a home that allows pets, adopt a furbaby to give her a piece of family for now?

That depends. One needs to bring a life into a home for several, several, several good reasons. Don’t do it because you want a man. (Who knows, it may not get along with your future man, anyway.)

A pro in the reasoning: dogs love us unconditionally, and when we take great care to give an animal slash family member all the nurturing and love he/she needs, we feel good about ourselves, and we grow. Taking in a dog can push us further along the path to full adulthood – but one must already be at a particular step along that way. Then we take the George Bailey factor of sustaining a life and even giving it meaning and happiness, with that unconditional love – and we will believe we deserve love. And we will deserve it even more so, and will be more ready to give it all the better.

And for those who are not ready, you’re still in the stage when you need to nurture, feed, heal, and cleanse your own soul. Women never really begin to take care of someone, we’ve always done it. But we need to slow down, and focus on #1 until we’re ready for a second. Ladies are so impatient!

So women’s next best thing to a soul mate may be a dog, but our first best thing, even coming before a romantic partner, is the woman herself. Woman’s best friend is herself. (And hey, we’re shinier than a diamond, anyway!)